I’m not finding it so odd that our very own Triple Chinned Bull in a China Shop is a big fan of the Winston Churchill bust. I also take no issue with the Churchill bust returning to the White House, natch. Why bother?

After all, it’s pretty standard for busts to shift as administrations change. However, in honor of Diamond Don’s affinity for the Churchill bust, I’d like to take this moment to remind him of some of Churchill’s most famous quotes that he appears to have forgotten or misunderstood. I think these should be instructive to him:

“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.”

Hint: it’s time to move on to the second part. The life part. (Does it help to imagine these words coming from the Churchill bust?)

Takeaway: start giving back. Stop taking things, from workers, from citizens, from others.

“A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”

Okay, stick with me on this for a minute. I know that sounds pretty good, like lies are fast and easy. But think of it this way: what’s halfway around the world? CHINA. Also, naked truths sound more damaging, right? So just try some truth here and there. Think of the buzz you’ll get!

Each time you lie to us, your citizens who depend on you, the Churchill bust is crying on the inside.

Takeaway: stop lying all the time.

“Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.”

That’s right. Even though it’s no fun to get criticized, it’s really very important. It lets us know how we can actually improve and be our best selves. It is damaging when we can’t accept criticism, and when a leader can’t accept criticism, it damages not only the leader, but also the people.

Takeaway: learn to take constructive criticism and stop acting like people who disagree are your blood enemies.

“The price of greatness is responsibility.”

It is irresponsible to violate the law of the United States if you want to be the President. It is irresponsible to incite hate crimes between citizens. It is irresponsible to refuse to divest financial interests, reveal tax documents, and appoint appropriate people to run critical government agencies.

Takeaway: be responsible and take responsibility if you’d like to resemble an actual leader of the people.

“‘No comment’ is a splendid expression. I am using it again and again.”

It’s okay to not talk/yell/Tweet or deploy someone else to talk or yell on your behalf sometimes. Or even to stop short of blurting out every thought that flies into your mind like a hummingbird.

Takeaway: unless what you’re saying is adding value, maybe don’t say it.

On a related note:

“A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject.”

For example, if you can’t seem to get past some inane, inconsequential subject and keep blathering on about it publicly, it does in fact make you seem a bit crazy. Also, the whole always being right–even when you’re clearly wrong–that too makes you seem fanatical. (You are totally chafing the Churchill bust.)

Takeaway: if you can’t or won’t learn to be open enough to changing your mind sometimes, at least drop things more readily.

“Study history, study history. In history lies all the secrets of statecraft.”

This is a big one. It’s very important to understand what happened before you decided to whimsically show up and upend the deeply rooted political, diplomatic, cultural, and commercial networks of the nation.

Takeaway: take a course in history, at least US history. There’s one on Khan Academy right here, for example.

“Russia is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.”

Russia is a pretty complicated culture with a politically complex history. It is entirely possible that you don’t have the understanding of Russia that you might imagine you do. It’s also possible that they don’t view whatever you’re doing with them as the other half of a simple business deal.

Takeaway: realize that you’re out of your depth on this one and defer to some people who are less so, like your combined intelligence teams.

“It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations.”

I’m not saying you’re uneducated, but obviously you are.

Takeaway: quotes are short, useful, and came highly recommended by Churchill.

“You can always count on Americans to do the right thing – after they’ve tried everything else.”

So if this is true, eventually we’ll get rid of you. It will probably take us awhile to try everything else. My guess is that you’ve got some time. Still, remember that we will figure it out, and at that point, you’ll have to deal with us.

Takeaway: this thing you’ve created will not last.